This month, Betty shares with us an experience she had diving into her past, and the discoveries she made along the way. It is wonderful to read about her non-judgmental and non-forceful journey into the past. Thank you, Betty!
— Siska Tovey, Director, New Equations
Still in the profound energy of my experiences in Berlin (you can read more in our October blog), and filled with awe and gratefulness, I could tell there was something new and beautiful waiting for me. Oslo was calling! My first NEATO gathering!
A new me was returning to Oslo—the city of my Soultyping! Full of curiosity, excitement, and joy, I found myself welcomed with warmth and heart. I truly felt I had returned to my soul family. The NEATO gathering deepened my own soul’s journey when I experienced the magical qualities of each Soultype who attended. It was so much fun to be surrounded by loving souls sharing their special gifts, and being able to offer my own soul’s strength. Each moment was filled with laughter, ease, and soul depth, and even now, just thinking about it, a smile returns to my face and my heart rejoices. The NEATO gathering was another milestone on my ‘returning to my soul’ journey.
When I returned home, I felt the urge to sort through some old photos. My photos stuffed the overseas trunk I had kept from my time traveling by cargo ship to the USA at the age of 18. It was filled to the brim with old-fashioned paper photos! Half a century of unsorted life events jumped into my face! I dug through the pictures, wondering why I was doing this. Mentally, it did not make any sense, as there were more important things I could have been doing. But, obediently following my inner impulse, I sat on the floor (I am Soultype 8!) and piled up hundreds and hundreds of photos around me, looking at them, remembering my life’s journey, trying to somehow create a structure. So, I made a pile for: young adult, before family, relationships, family, daughters, relatives, friends, business, events, etc., but after many long hours, and a night without sleep, I still wondered what in the heck am I doing? It ended up that I put all the piles in different boxes, labeled them, and found a new place to store them . . . but, why did I do all this work? My trunk called on me to experience its empty space. I kept staring at it.
What was my drive to do this trying to tell me? Was there a message? Slowly, slowly, the importance of having done so much—in my opinion, unnecessary work—came to me on the soft wings of my soul. I almost didn’t notice the gentle reflection that was delivered to me. Throughout all the hours sorting through decades of my life, there had not been a single judgmental thought, such as: this was a good time, or that was a bad time.
I saw the courage, the trust, the aspiration, the joy, the fun, the searching, the pain, the beauty . . .
What I did not see was the style of my hair, my outfit, my weight, whether or not it was a successful situation, whether or not it was a nice or difficult time. All of that did not matter.
Truly, very silently and peacefully, I had said YES to everything, without even recognizing that I did so. It had not been an acknowledgment technique, as I had practiced hundreds of times before, that never reached me deep inside. Instead, I saw me, I acknowledged me, with a deep recognition of myself that showed me who I really am. There were no buts involved. There was no trying to weigh the value of my life. I had been looking at my life from my soul’s perspective without being aware that I did so, and I nearly missed this insight, so gentle and unspectacular, and yet so strong!
My overseas trunk was empty! It was a wonderful feeling to look at it. Within me, the awareness arose that my past was now consciously connected to my soul. My last fifty years, in a moment of clutter clearing, had returned to, and reconnected with, my soul.
Lovingly and silently, my soul had supported me to grow and change in a totally unexpected way and with so much ease. Now my memories are freed from emotional charge. Now my soul wisdom can arise. I am ready to journey with my soul and explore unknown terrain. The biggest adventure yet is waiting for me. I am ready for it!
Are you ready for YOUR soul journey?
PS: I’m curious about what I’ll fill my trunk with next =)