It is a beautiful day. The sky is blue, and the air is cool with a hint of warmth after a day and night of rain. It seems as if the world has turned from end-of-winter gray/brown to a vibrant green, punctuated by bright yellows, pinks, purples, reds, and whites of spring bulbs and flowering trees. For the past few weeks, I have been slowly awakening by being with and expanding my experience of Soultype 9. As I step outside, I feel an alive and joyous buoyancy. I feel my body doing its best to breathe, expand, and receive all there is on this spring morning.
I am on the phone with an old friend. It is so nice to be with her today—her presence asks nothing of me except to be present with her. My friend intimately knows profound loss and deep grief. I feel within myself how she has found places deep inside herself to be with and process excruciating pain. The tenderness with which she holds her own suffering is palpable.
In this quiet connection, I feel my own unfolding loss and layers of past and current grief. I sense how my heart both holds tightly to and against this pain. There is a yearning in me for something that is difficult to name—my heart wants something that I cannot seem to give it. Then, I remember Spiritual Portal 9 between the shoulder blades. I do my best to bring my attention there. I exhale. My heart seems to find new breath and suppleness. It can breathe, expand, contract, and expand again. This inner expansion and suppleness are such new experiences for me.
In the connection between my friend and me, I sense infinite space, warmth, and gentleness. It is good to be alive with whatever life might bring.
My eight-year-old granddaughter and I are driving home from school. “Look!” she exclaims. “The clouds are so beautiful!”
“What do you see?” I ask.
“The sun is coming through and shining its light on the clouds. I love it when the sun shines on the clouds.”
“Wow, I see. So beautiful,” I reply.
I feel her wonder and awe.
I feel my wonder and awe.
Together, we enjoy the radiant clouds.
Catherine Dickey, Soultype 4, is a student in the NEATO Level 3 – New Equations Creative Soul program. You can find her in Dedham, Massachusetts, USA, enjoying connecting deeply with people, animals, and the natural world.